So, i told you I had to write an essay. That’s not entirely true. This post could be considered a form of an essay. Uh. I just wanted to let you know that tonight was weird. I only said that stuff because I was already upset and things were getting to me. I don’t know. i wish I hadn’t said anything really. Everything you told me, I knew was true. I just.. I wish I didn’t have to pick fights and argue over things that are bothering me. I guess I’m just stubborn. But I wanted to let you know that you don’t have to apologize. You don’t have room to. I know this is just like me, turning things around and finding someway to blame myself, but I’m serious about this. Everything you tried to prove, is something I already knew. (I’ve been good with rhyming and turning accidental rhymes into lyrics). I love you a lot. And I would like you to know that I’m putting this behind me because I know I was just over-thinking and being dumb. If you’d like to talk, I’d rather it be over skype, so I can see you. If you want to skype, send this phrase to me; “KEEP MY GOD DAMN DICK OUT YOUR MOUTH, FIFTY SHADES OF GAAAY!” If not, I understand. No worries. Again, I fucking love you, d00d. Writing this cheered me up, so. I’ll be in a good mood. Promise.
Hello. I haven’t written you something in a few months. Wow. So. It seems we’ve both been kinda ‘eh’ lately, and I really want to change that so, c:
Well, Dear. You agreed to start over with me. Forget everything that’s happened, and go back to that day and try to take it from the top. I’m really happy you did that. I love you, Sessa. With all of my heart. I really do. Nobody could ever give me the feeling that you have given me. It’s indescribable. Like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It makes me want to jump and tell you that I love you and cuddle or some other cute thing. Nobody else could ever come close to the feeling you give me. The feeling when we’re both lying down, I’m holding you in my arms, our breaths are almost synchronized, except for you sometimes breathe fast. We’re both half asleep. Our bodies are as close as possible. i really like that. I couldn’t imagine myself doing that with anyone else. The feeling when we’re kissing, and it’s like i’m 12,000 feet in the air. The feeling when you kiss my cheek and all of my pain just floats away. The feeling when you tell me you love me, and I get all asdfjkl; because i know that it’s true and it’s just.. there’s actually somebody out there that loves me for who i am and wouldn’t want me any other way. and it’s just a good feeling knowing im not alone and that i can trust and rely on another person and i just want to be with you. All of the time. If I could cuddle with you 24/7, i’d take the chance in a heartbeat. I just love you, okay? so fucking much and I want so bad for everything to be okay and I know it will be soon because i have you and i always will have you. jrekg;tehr thank you for being there when nobody else was, and thank you for helping when nobody else would, and thank you for saving my life when nobody else cared. I love you, dear. c:
I’m sorry I don’t know how to control myself. I’m sorry that I do stupid things that not only hurt me, but also hurt you. I’m sorry I overreact and I’m sorry you have to deal with it.
I can’t believe you’re still here. I can’t believe you still love me despite everything that I’ve done and everything we’ve gone through.
Yet, here you are. Here we are. Eleven months, and counting. I just, I love you so much. I can’t tell you how much I love you because it’s just so much, and I’m just sorry that you have to deal with someone like me, but I’m so glad that you do, and that you’re still here.
I love you.
Happy eleven months, sailor.
I saw your personal about the girlfriend stuff..
I have one fucking thing to say to;
I had my chance and I didn’t take it for a reason. There’s nobody else that I would rather love than you. I don’t want a normal girlfriend. Normal is for turds. I want you. Nobody else. Just you. Sessa Leigh Fucking Richards. I don’t give two fucks if you’re not normal. You love me and I love you. Take it because it’s not happening any other way.
P.S. Marry me, Bear?
you told me to write you a cute message in the morning, and it’s exactly 10:29 P.M. i think that totally defies the phrase “in the morning.” whatever, man. c: i have to write you something now because i have no idea what time i’ll wake up in the morning, and you’ll probably be already headed to school.
um, these past few days have not been the best. ok, i take that back, these past few weeks really have not been the best for either of us. we’ve both been going through some things and you have no idea how much i want to make things better and make everything okay. you know if i could, i would in a heartbeat.
i used to hate waking up in the morning, but now, not so much. it’s just because i know i’m one day closer to seeing you. i’m one day closer to kissing you. i’m one day closer to hugging you and holding you and being with the guy i’m in love with.
i have to make this short because i’m going to bed soon since you told me not to stay up too late.
well, i really love you, hon. i’m sorry for being dumb, sometimes. i’m sorry for all the problems i’ve caused you. i’m sorry for the stress and worry that comes with dating me. i’m a teenager with more problems than i would like to have.
i’m glad you’re still here, though. i’m glad you haven’t left me because of my many problems. i really appreciate it, and i love you, and yeah.
have a good day, sailor. i love you. c:
dear sessa leigh richards,
hello, love. I’m home sick today so I thought I should use my time to write you something. Sometimes I don’t write because i feel like I have too much to say, but i guess i have time to say it all now. Uhm. Okay. Well, first off, words can not describe how in love i am with you. Every day, it’s like I’m falling again. Again and again. And every time I see you, I just get this feeling like nothing else matters. Like it’s just you and me. Like nothing can stop us, nothing will ever take us away from each other. When I look into your eyes, I can’t help but find myself smiling. It’s weird. Even when we’re trying to be serious. I have to hold back smiling like a fool. It’s crazy. I just.. I’m in love with you ogneogkeysmash. I want to do so many things with you. Ugh. Okay. I want to take a nap with you, I want to hold your hand all day, I want to make fun of you and you make fun of me, I want to cuddle all day, I want to go to a park and have a picnic, I want to kiss you in the rain (again. c:), I want to talk to you about anything, I just want to talk. I want to grow old with you. I want to explore the world with you. I want to hug you and kiss you and tell you everything’s okay. I want to marry you. I want to move to Chicago with you. I want to go to Warped with you. I want to get matching tattoos with you. I want to drive the four hours to your house in the middle of the night just to tell you I love you. I want to sit in a field and count the stars with you. I want to watch all of our favorite tv shows with you. I want to spend hours on tumblr with you. I want to read with you. I want to make coffee with you. I want to go to the beach with you. I want to stay up all night with you talking about how I want to do all of these things with you. I want to watch horror films with you. I want to sit in front of a turned off tv and just watch that with you. I want to kiss you all over. I want to go on a real date, like dinner and a movie type of date. I want to buy you cute sweaters. I want to buy you cute clothes in general. I want to play with your hair a lot. I want to play video games with you, preferably the Legend of Zelda. I want to make brownies with you. I want to take pictures with you. I want to build a snowman with you. I want to have a snowball fight with you. I want to make robot voices in a fan with you. I want to move to England with you. I want to sing our favorite songs with you. I want to get a little kitten with you. I want to get two huskies with you. I want to drive around, to no specific destination, with you. I want to visit you when you move. I want to love you forever, and be loved by you forever. But most of all, I want to fall in love over and over again with you. I love you, Sessa. more than anything in the world and I don’t know what I’d do without you. I really don’t. Please don’t ever leave. It’s obvious we both need each other very much. If I didn’t have you in my life, I’m sure I’d either be dead, or locked up in a mental institution for losing my fucking mind. So, I’m glad you decided to stay. We’ve been through a lot the past almost eleven months and I’m so grateful for everything that you’ve done for me. Like I said, I don’t know what the fuck I would do without you, darling. c:
I love you. Just… So fucking much.
~kane christopher lariviere
P.S. You’re cute. :D